Marital Advice Part II

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, in order to make her holy by cleansing her with the washing of water by the word, so as to present the church to himself in splendor, that she may be holy and without blemish. In the same way, husbands should love their wives as they do their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one every hates his own body, but he nourishes and tenderly cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, because we are members of this body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. " This is a great mystery, and I am applying it to Christ and the church. Each of you, however, should love his wife as himself, and a wife should respect her husband. Ephesians 5:25-33 NRSV

As I said yesterday, the understanding of these verses must include Christ's love for the church, which becomes a husbands' love for his wife. We talk about being Christ's body when we speak of being the church. Therefore the husband should treat his wife as he does his own body, caring for her with consistent tenderness. Christ loves the church as a husband loves his wife.

What I find really interesting is that Paul never mentions the love a wife should have for the husband. Paul says the wife should be subject to her husband and respect the husband but only the husband is instructed to love his wife. And he spends a lot more time instructing husbands than he does wives!!!

As a wife, I understand that sometimes respecting your spouse is harder than loving your spouse. Any married people out their agree with me on this? My understanding is that contempt for one's spouse can be the decisive emotion on the road to divorce. Paul seems to have a good grasp of that making me wonder about his parent's own marriage....

Paul asks husbands to love their wives as they do their own bodies. Paul asks wives to subject themselves to and respect their husbands. But Paul does this within the understanding of what it means to be the Church, the Body of Christ. Self-sacrifice is involved for both marriage partners. This is not an imarriage or a me-marriage. This is about being one.

God, you ask a lot of us in our marriages and in the church. We really are struggling with these things, Lord. In Jesus' name. Amen.

Question for today (and for yesterday, which I forgot): After thinking of what Paul is trying to say about marriage, do you agree? Does your own marriage or your parents' marriage fit the model of Christ and his Church?

Copyright 2009 Amelia G. Sims

I Insist

Now this I affirm and insist on in the Lord: you must no longer live as the Gentiles live, in the futility of their minds. They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of their ignorance and hardness of heart. They have lost all sensitivity and have abandoned themselves to licentiousness, greedy to practice every kind of impurity. That is not the way you learned Christ! Ephesians 4: 17-20 NRSV

Paul moves from begging to insisting the the church at Ephesus stop acting like they used to. They have learned about Christ so they need to act like it.

Would someone visiting your church today be able to say that your church is acting like Christ-like? Or is there very little difference between your church and one of the local community organizations or clubs? What kinds of differences should we be seeing, exactly?

Paul tells the church that those on the outside live in the futility of their minds. I imagine that
this would be like living thinking you know the answers to life in the superiority of your own mind and minds just as brilliant as yours. Because of this self-importance, Paul says these folks are alienated from God and their hearts are hardened. He goes on to talk about lack of sensitivity, licentiousness, greed, and impurity that results. These folks are simply acting apart from God, in the dark as it were.

But, Paul says, you in the church know better! You have been taught about Christ and should stop living in your own minds.

In fact, Paul insists on it.

God, you have given us the opportunity to learn Christ. Help us to act like it. In Christ's name. Amen.

Question for the day: What kind of behavior have you shown lately - Christ-like or futile?

Copyright 2009 Amelia G. Sims